We cannot selectively numb emotions! We numb one and we numb them all. When life if uncomfortable and the remnants of past traumatic incidences get too close to the surface of reality, we have a tendency to numb out! What does this mean to you and I? This means that if we numb SADNESS and ANGER, we also numb JOY!
What are the ways that we can numb out? Too many to count! Spending, eating, sleeping, drinking, sex, drugs, medication, pornography, exercise, media, video games, cell phones, social websites…..need I go on? Each of us has our own way of attempting to deny the feelings of discomfort in our life. Whether we had an abusive childhood, experienced the death of a loved one, have gone through a nasty divorce, or maybe we have had a teenager that has broken the law and is waiting for the court date. In each of these examples, there are multiple feelings that we do not know how to handle. When we do not know how to handle them, we have a tendency to reach for a numbing agent outside of us to make us feel like a whole and okay person. In that process, we set ourselves up for failure by surrendering to a false sense of hope. In the process of that failure, we then experience the consequences of whatever we gave our power to! Ultimately in this emotional crazy cycle we limit the ability to love effectively. When we remove the barriers of past, we then have the opportunity to love self and others effectively.
It’s time! Pick one area of your life that is holding you back. Ask yourself why you are embracing that which is self-defeating. Now make an intentional plan to deal with it in an effective way. The quality of your relationships depends on it!